I will search for the first names of three of the most famous pop stars in the world: Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson and Paris Hilton. Britney and Jessica sing. Paris earned her fame by going to parties. Still, all three are pop stars, but only two are pop music stars.
Here is the game. Just by reading the search description from the returns, will we find more instances of the word "Hilton," "Simpson," or "Spears."
I say that Hilton will show up the most. I say that because there has to be something magical about the popularity of an amoral, idle-rich celebrity with the body of a 13-year-old boy. There has to be something about her that caused her to be famous.
Here we go.
Today's Search Term: Britney, Jessica, Paris.
I found just one instance of the word "Spears" in the Top Ten returns. Remember, I am only looking in the description.
There are five instances of the word "Simpson" in the Top Ten. Will Paris show up more? Am I right about the popularity of talentless rich people?
There are only four instances of "Hilton," so Ms. Simpson wins this little battle.
I don't know what it all means. I know that Spears is busy trying to get back on top, but her last name showed up just the once. Hilton has never done a darned thing and she shows up almost as much as Jessica Simpson.
Who can tell?
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Friday, September 12, 2008
Funniest joke ever
Today I will search and report the top return for the funniest joke ever. That's pretty simple. Let's see who wins the battle of the Internet.
Today's Search Term: Funniest Joke Ever.
The winner and top return is a page on InnocentEnglish.com. They have an article on the funniest jokes ever. Here is the first joke that they present.
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “Okay, now what?”
That is a funny joke, but I heard it years and years ago. Is it still the funniest joke, if you already know the punchline? Well, maybe....
This would be a good search term for you to explore. Many of the returns talk about the Top 50 jokes or the Top 100 jokes; so you will have a couple of hours of laughs ahead of you if you do the searching.
Until next time, keep thinking outside of the box.
Today's Search Term: Funniest Joke Ever.
The winner and top return is a page on InnocentEnglish.com. They have an article on the funniest jokes ever. Here is the first joke that they present.
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “Okay, now what?”
That is a funny joke, but I heard it years and years ago. Is it still the funniest joke, if you already know the punchline? Well, maybe....
This would be a good search term for you to explore. Many of the returns talk about the Top 50 jokes or the Top 100 jokes; so you will have a couple of hours of laughs ahead of you if you do the searching.
Until next time, keep thinking outside of the box.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
AZBYC
Today's search term is made by starting with the first letter of the alphabet (A) and adding the last letter (Z) and then adding the second (B) and the second to last (Y) and finally the third letter (C) of the alphabet. This forms a five-letter search term: AZBYC.
We are looking to see how many letters we have to use to come up with a term that does not have any Google returns.
Today's First Search Term: AZBYC.
There are 917 returns for AZBYC. That's not too many. From the results, it appears that a lot of people are using that term as their screen name. For instance, the first return is a name on Stumbleupon. The second is a name on FaceBook. The third is a name on NetLog. The list goes on.
So we add a letter.
Today's Second Search Term: AZBYCX
Uh-oh. There are over 4,000 returns for this search term. We are going backwards.
So we add another letter.
Today's Third Search Term; AZBYCXD
We are back down to 91 returns, and there are still people who are choosing it as a screen name.
Today's Fourth Search Term: AZBYCXDW
878 returns
Today's Fifth Search Term: AZBYCXDWE
Only 9 returns. We're almost there. The top return is for a Mensa quiz about Jim and his baseball cards. Just thought you might be interested.
Today's Sixth and Hopefully Last Search Term: AZBYCXDWEV
242 returns. We're going backwards again. Crap.
Today's Seventh Search Term: AZBYCXDWEVF
3 returns. Woohoo, almost there.
Today's Eighth Search Term: AZBYCXDWEVFU
508 returns. Rrrrrrrr!!!
Today's Ninth Search Term: AZBYCXDWEVFUG
Finally, finally, finally. No returns. Boy, that took forever. I won't be doing patterns of letters like this very much. It takes too long. Yeesh!!
We are looking to see how many letters we have to use to come up with a term that does not have any Google returns.
Today's First Search Term: AZBYC.
There are 917 returns for AZBYC. That's not too many. From the results, it appears that a lot of people are using that term as their screen name. For instance, the first return is a name on Stumbleupon. The second is a name on FaceBook. The third is a name on NetLog. The list goes on.
So we add a letter.
Today's Second Search Term: AZBYCX
Uh-oh. There are over 4,000 returns for this search term. We are going backwards.
So we add another letter.
Today's Third Search Term; AZBYCXD
We are back down to 91 returns, and there are still people who are choosing it as a screen name.
Today's Fourth Search Term: AZBYCXDW
878 returns
Today's Fifth Search Term: AZBYCXDWE
Only 9 returns. We're almost there. The top return is for a Mensa quiz about Jim and his baseball cards. Just thought you might be interested.
Today's Sixth and Hopefully Last Search Term: AZBYCXDWEV
242 returns. We're going backwards again. Crap.
Today's Seventh Search Term: AZBYCXDWEVF
3 returns. Woohoo, almost there.
Today's Eighth Search Term: AZBYCXDWEVFU
508 returns. Rrrrrrrr!!!
Today's Ninth Search Term: AZBYCXDWEVFUG
Finally, finally, finally. No returns. Boy, that took forever. I won't be doing patterns of letters like this very much. It takes too long. Yeesh!!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
The Cat's Pajamas
Today's search will be for a term that was very common back in great great great grandma's day. In the 1920s, people walked around saying that cool things were "the Cat's Pajamas" or were "The Bees Knees." There were plenty of similar expressions that were kind of silly and fun.
But that was way, way back before the Internet. How many people today use those terms? Let's find out. Today, I am looking for the two most interesting returns out of the Top Ten. I will ignore the others.
Today's Search Term: The Bees Knees.
Wow, there are 281,000 returns. Return No. 1 is for the Bees Knees Restaurant in Morrisville, Vermont. They emphasize locally grown and organic vegetables. So if you want to live long, eat at the Bees Knees, but if you want to live life fully, go find a greasy spoon.
The second return I will talk about is return No. 3, which has this description in its return: "the bee's knees". (Phrase Origins) A bee's "corbiculae", or pollen-baskets, are located on its tibiae (midsegments of its legs). ...
So if someone says something is the bee's knees, you can reply by saying "Do you mean the corbiculae on the midsegments of the tibia?"
That should shut them up.
But that was way, way back before the Internet. How many people today use those terms? Let's find out. Today, I am looking for the two most interesting returns out of the Top Ten. I will ignore the others.
Today's Search Term: The Bees Knees.
Wow, there are 281,000 returns. Return No. 1 is for the Bees Knees Restaurant in Morrisville, Vermont. They emphasize locally grown and organic vegetables. So if you want to live long, eat at the Bees Knees, but if you want to live life fully, go find a greasy spoon.
The second return I will talk about is return No. 3, which has this description in its return: "the bee's knees". (Phrase Origins) A bee's "corbiculae", or pollen-baskets, are located on its tibiae (midsegments of its legs). ...
So if someone says something is the bee's knees, you can reply by saying "Do you mean the corbiculae on the midsegments of the tibia?"
That should shut them up.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
McBama
Today's term is called a portmanteau. A portmanteau is a word that is formed by jamming two other words together to form a new word.
I jammed McCain and Obama together and came up with McBama. There are other words that you could form: McCama, Mcama, Mbama. If you swapped the two names, you could form: Obain, OCain, ObaMcCain.
But I get to pick and I pick McBama. Write your own blog if you want to be such a control freak.
Today's Search Term: McBama.
I predict that there are hundreds of thousands of returns. Am I right? What do you think?
Well, whaddya know, I was right. There are about 644,000 pages on the Internet with the term "McBama." Most of them do not seem to be happy sites. You don't have to read them to recognize the hostility and intolerance of political attack dogs.
What I want you to take with you today is the knowledge that occasionally I am right. So keep the faith. I just might do it again before the year is out.
I jammed McCain and Obama together and came up with McBama. There are other words that you could form: McCama, Mcama, Mbama. If you swapped the two names, you could form: Obain, OCain, ObaMcCain.
But I get to pick and I pick McBama. Write your own blog if you want to be such a control freak.
Today's Search Term: McBama.
I predict that there are hundreds of thousands of returns. Am I right? What do you think?
Well, whaddya know, I was right. There are about 644,000 pages on the Internet with the term "McBama." Most of them do not seem to be happy sites. You don't have to read them to recognize the hostility and intolerance of political attack dogs.
What I want you to take with you today is the knowledge that occasionally I am right. So keep the faith. I just might do it again before the year is out.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Violet Chicken Bank
How goofy are you? Can you think up terms that nobody else has ever used? It's a fun little game to see if you can stump Google.
Today I am using a three-word phrase and I will search for that exact phrase. The only returns will be for pages that have those three words side by side and in that order.
Today's Search Term: Violet Chicken Bank.
I win. Google says that there are zero pages that contain that particular phrase. It would be an unusual one, but I wasn't confident that I would win. There is such an overwhelming amount of stuff on the Internet.
Anyway, let's break it down. I am going to do two more searches: Violet Chicken and Chicken Bank. We will see which term has the greatest number of search returns.
Today's Second Search Term: Violet Chicken.
152 pages on the Internet have the term "Violet Chicken." That makes it relatively rare, but it can be found.
Today's Third Search Term: Chicken Bank.
2,170 pages return for "Chicken Bank." Still rare, but much more common than "Violet Chicken." Apparently, there are a fair number of children's banks in the shape of chickens.
That's all for today. See you tomorrow with another oddball search for nothing in particular.
Today I am using a three-word phrase and I will search for that exact phrase. The only returns will be for pages that have those three words side by side and in that order.
Today's Search Term: Violet Chicken Bank.
I win. Google says that there are zero pages that contain that particular phrase. It would be an unusual one, but I wasn't confident that I would win. There is such an overwhelming amount of stuff on the Internet.
Anyway, let's break it down. I am going to do two more searches: Violet Chicken and Chicken Bank. We will see which term has the greatest number of search returns.
Today's Second Search Term: Violet Chicken.
152 pages on the Internet have the term "Violet Chicken." That makes it relatively rare, but it can be found.
Today's Third Search Term: Chicken Bank.
2,170 pages return for "Chicken Bank." Still rare, but much more common than "Violet Chicken." Apparently, there are a fair number of children's banks in the shape of chickens.
That's all for today. See you tomorrow with another oddball search for nothing in particular.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Down and Dirty Search
Today, we are going to do a down and dirty search on a common phrase, such as: Down and Dirty.
This ubiquitous phrase is used by everyone; so i imagine that the results will be all over the board.
Today's Search Term: Down and Dirty.
Well, half of the returns are about songs.
Nos. 1 and 3 are about Keyshia Cole's song "Down and Dirty.
No. 2 is Quiet Riot's song "Down and Dirty.
Nos. 6 and 10 are Ludacris's song "Down in the Dirty."
That means half the returns are about songs. Of the other five returns, two of them are about movies.
No. 4 is a book on Amazon named: "Down and Dirty Pictures: Miramax, Sundance, and the Rise of Independent Film."
No. 5 is the IMDB.com page for a movie named: "Down 'n Dirty." Directed by Fred Williamson. With Fred Williamson, Bubba Smith, Gary Busey.
That leaves just three returns that are not about movies or songs. What could those three be? Hmmmm.
No. 7 is a blog called Dirty Down by a DJ who writes of his travels from club to club.
That means that 8 of 10 returns are about music or movies. Only two returns are left.
No. 8 is the first return that doesn't have anything to do with pop culture. Instead, it is Sam's Work Blog where he talks about getting down and dirty with OpenID.
Yay, it's a new topic. Boo, it's boring.
The final return of the Top Ten is No. 9. That return is interesting. It comes from the Discover Education people. They have a page named The Dirt on Soil that has a "Down & Dirty Recipe for Soil. It's an excellent site. Please check it out.
That's it for today. It was worth wading through the search results. I always wanted a good recipe for dirt. My old recipe tastes bland.
This ubiquitous phrase is used by everyone; so i imagine that the results will be all over the board.
Today's Search Term: Down and Dirty.
Well, half of the returns are about songs.
Nos. 1 and 3 are about Keyshia Cole's song "Down and Dirty.
No. 2 is Quiet Riot's song "Down and Dirty.
Nos. 6 and 10 are Ludacris's song "Down in the Dirty."
That means half the returns are about songs. Of the other five returns, two of them are about movies.
No. 4 is a book on Amazon named: "Down and Dirty Pictures: Miramax, Sundance, and the Rise of Independent Film."
No. 5 is the IMDB.com page for a movie named: "Down 'n Dirty." Directed by Fred Williamson. With Fred Williamson, Bubba Smith, Gary Busey.
That leaves just three returns that are not about movies or songs. What could those three be? Hmmmm.
No. 7 is a blog called Dirty Down by a DJ who writes of his travels from club to club.
That means that 8 of 10 returns are about music or movies. Only two returns are left.
No. 8 is the first return that doesn't have anything to do with pop culture. Instead, it is Sam's Work Blog where he talks about getting down and dirty with OpenID.
Yay, it's a new topic. Boo, it's boring.
The final return of the Top Ten is No. 9. That return is interesting. It comes from the Discover Education people. They have a page named The Dirt on Soil that has a "Down & Dirty Recipe for Soil. It's an excellent site. Please check it out.
That's it for today. It was worth wading through the search results. I always wanted a good recipe for dirt. My old recipe tastes bland.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
ZXWY
This is one of my favorite games. I start with a short string of letters, do a search, add a letter to the string, repeat until Google doesn't show any returns for the string.
Normally, with the first search string, somebody somewhere has an acronym made up of those letters. Even if you pick the most unlikely combo that you can think of, somebody is using it.
So that is what I will do today. The most unlikely set of four letters that I can think of are: ZXWY. I'll bet that there are at least hundreds of returns in the search results.
The real game is to see if you win (find zero search returns) before you get to seven letters. With these letters as our search term, we have a shot.
So let's do it.
Today's First Search Term: ZXWY.
Google reports over 34,000 returns for ZXWY.
The first return is from Who.is. They report that ZXWY.net is owned by BEIJING INNOVATIVE LINKAGE TECHNOLOGY.
The second return is on Trackitt.com about a guy from China who says that he is ZXWY. He wants to emigrate to America.
So, plenty of returns for ZXWY. Step Two is add a letter and try again.
Today's Second Search Term: ZXWYT.
Google shows only 355 returns; so we are making progress towards zero returns.
This search is a real oddity. This is the first time that all of the Top Ten returns are not in English. Most of them are not even European languages, although one might be Russian and another one might be from a Slavic country. Either way, I can't make heads or tails out of any of them.
So it's on to the third search.
Today's Third Search Term: ZXWYTP
Nine returns. Darn. If I want to get it down to zero, I will have to add the seventh letter. I lost the game. Let's see if I can escape with a little self-respect.
Today's Fourth (and hopefully last) Search Term: ZXWYTPF.
Dang, dang, and double dang. Google still shows two returns; although both returns are pages from the same site.
Dang, dang, dang.
Today's Very Humiliating Fifth Search Term: ZXWYTPFL.
Hooray, no returns. Google can't find any sites at all that include that search term.
I began this blog entry by saying I was going to use the most unusal letter combination I could think of. I did not think that I would have to use eight letters before Google would zero returns in the results. I do better than eight letters all the time. Boy, was I wrong about ZXWY being unusual.
As Granpappy Ike would have said, "Who would have thunk it?"
Normally, with the first search string, somebody somewhere has an acronym made up of those letters. Even if you pick the most unlikely combo that you can think of, somebody is using it.
So that is what I will do today. The most unlikely set of four letters that I can think of are: ZXWY. I'll bet that there are at least hundreds of returns in the search results.
The real game is to see if you win (find zero search returns) before you get to seven letters. With these letters as our search term, we have a shot.
So let's do it.
Today's First Search Term: ZXWY.
Google reports over 34,000 returns for ZXWY.
The first return is from Who.is. They report that ZXWY.net is owned by BEIJING INNOVATIVE LINKAGE TECHNOLOGY.
The second return is on Trackitt.com about a guy from China who says that he is ZXWY. He wants to emigrate to America.
So, plenty of returns for ZXWY. Step Two is add a letter and try again.
Today's Second Search Term: ZXWYT.
Google shows only 355 returns; so we are making progress towards zero returns.
This search is a real oddity. This is the first time that all of the Top Ten returns are not in English. Most of them are not even European languages, although one might be Russian and another one might be from a Slavic country. Either way, I can't make heads or tails out of any of them.
So it's on to the third search.
Today's Third Search Term: ZXWYTP
Nine returns. Darn. If I want to get it down to zero, I will have to add the seventh letter. I lost the game. Let's see if I can escape with a little self-respect.
Today's Fourth (and hopefully last) Search Term: ZXWYTPF.
Dang, dang, and double dang. Google still shows two returns; although both returns are pages from the same site.
Dang, dang, dang.
Today's Very Humiliating Fifth Search Term: ZXWYTPFL.
Hooray, no returns. Google can't find any sites at all that include that search term.
I began this blog entry by saying I was going to use the most unusal letter combination I could think of. I did not think that I would have to use eight letters before Google would zero returns in the results. I do better than eight letters all the time. Boy, was I wrong about ZXWY being unusual.
As Granpappy Ike would have said, "Who would have thunk it?"
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Most Popular Search Terms
If you want the most popular search terms used on the Internet, all you have to do is like, duh, search for the "most popular search terms".
I did. Guess what I found? Was it Obama and McCain? How about Paris, Jessica and Britney? Or Wii and PS2. Or the Cowboys and Eagles? Or -- or -- ah, heck, here's the list that Lycos provides.
1 Paris Hilton (1st last week also)
2 Clay Aiken
3 YouTube
4 Michael Phelps (the Olympic star)
5 Olympics
6 Pamela Anderson
7 Facebook
8 Dara Torres (Olympic star)
9 Madonna
10 Morgan Freeman
That's a good list, but I am surprised at a few of them.
Lycos lists the Top Fifty; so if you are interested you can check out the rest of them.
btw: I used Lycos because I couldn't figure out how or where Google lists the top searches. While I was trying to find it on Google, I accidentally ran across it on Lycos. That's close enough for government work, as they say.
I did. Guess what I found? Was it Obama and McCain? How about Paris, Jessica and Britney? Or Wii and PS2. Or the Cowboys and Eagles? Or -- or -- ah, heck, here's the list that Lycos provides.
1 Paris Hilton (1st last week also)
2 Clay Aiken
3 YouTube
4 Michael Phelps (the Olympic star)
5 Olympics
6 Pamela Anderson
7 Facebook
8 Dara Torres (Olympic star)
9 Madonna
10 Morgan Freeman
That's a good list, but I am surprised at a few of them.
Lycos lists the Top Fifty; so if you are interested you can check out the rest of them.
btw: I used Lycos because I couldn't figure out how or where Google lists the top searches. While I was trying to find it on Google, I accidentally ran across it on Lycos. That's close enough for government work, as they say.
Monday, September 1, 2008
John Wayne and Pauly Shore
Okay, this one should raise some interesting pages. Where on earth can we find a site that talks about John Wayne and Pauly Shore on the same page?
Oh, yeah, right. On movie pages.
Anywhere else you can think of? No? Well, let's find out.
Today's Search Term: "John Wayne" and "Pauly Shore." I won't be visiting the actual pages today. Too much Pauly isn't good for the brain. Instead, I'll just be reviewing the search results as Google returns them.
By the way, using quotes around the terms will ensure that the search results have those two search terms. Without quotes, we would find pages that have John, Wayne, Pauly, and Shore, but not necessarily the two people that we are searching for.
No. 1 return is: A thoroughly boring USA entry. It mentions John Wayne Airport which is in Santa Ana and something unknown about Pauly Shore.
No. 2 return is: Much more interesting. It's from SofaCinema.co.uk, and it apparently lists the cast of a John Wayne movie. The cast is: John Wayne, Roscoe Lee Browne, Bruce Dern - Mark Rydell. Let us know if you recognize the movie. Then it goes on to say "PAULY SHORE IS DEAD is a good idea both on paper and on film, a movie that answers the question..." And that's all the info you get from the search return. You would have to go to the site to find more, and we aren't doing that today.
No. 3 has this for its full return: "Here comes John Wayne. “I’m not going to cry about my Pa. ... I hate Pauly Shore, but I gotta say I actually felt really bad for him when I watched it." It is from a forum. Who knows what they were actually writing about.
No. 7 has this for its full return: "John Wayne Gacy. Top of page Previous message Next message Bottom of page Link .... Fuck Pauly Shore. "I'm stupid and broke and perform on small stages now! ..." Oops, that's not the real John Wayne, but I like that somebody is making fun of Pauly Shore. There seems to be more of an industry in putting that guy down, than there is in promoting him or his movies.
No. 8 has this for its full return: "Where did Pauly Shore go? Did he die when everyone realized his gimmick was ... In one of John Ford's best-known films, Henry Fonda and John Wayne play ..." Apparently somebody else finds it easy to make Pauly Shore the butt of a joke.
That's it. There are plenty more, but that is all I will cover. I never realized it before but making fun of Pauly Shore can become tedious over time.
Who knew?!!
Oh, yeah, right. On movie pages.
Anywhere else you can think of? No? Well, let's find out.
Today's Search Term: "John Wayne" and "Pauly Shore." I won't be visiting the actual pages today. Too much Pauly isn't good for the brain. Instead, I'll just be reviewing the search results as Google returns them.
By the way, using quotes around the terms will ensure that the search results have those two search terms. Without quotes, we would find pages that have John, Wayne, Pauly, and Shore, but not necessarily the two people that we are searching for.
No. 1 return is: A thoroughly boring USA entry. It mentions John Wayne Airport which is in Santa Ana and something unknown about Pauly Shore.
No. 2 return is: Much more interesting. It's from SofaCinema.co.uk, and it apparently lists the cast of a John Wayne movie. The cast is: John Wayne, Roscoe Lee Browne, Bruce Dern - Mark Rydell. Let us know if you recognize the movie. Then it goes on to say "PAULY SHORE IS DEAD is a good idea both on paper and on film, a movie that answers the question..." And that's all the info you get from the search return. You would have to go to the site to find more, and we aren't doing that today.
No. 3 has this for its full return: "Here comes John Wayne. “I’m not going to cry about my Pa. ... I hate Pauly Shore, but I gotta say I actually felt really bad for him when I watched it." It is from a forum. Who knows what they were actually writing about.
No. 7 has this for its full return: "John Wayne Gacy. Top of page Previous message Next message Bottom of page Link .... Fuck Pauly Shore. "I'm stupid and broke and perform on small stages now! ..." Oops, that's not the real John Wayne, but I like that somebody is making fun of Pauly Shore. There seems to be more of an industry in putting that guy down, than there is in promoting him or his movies.
No. 8 has this for its full return: "Where did Pauly Shore go? Did he die when everyone realized his gimmick was ... In one of John Ford's best-known films, Henry Fonda and John Wayne play ..." Apparently somebody else finds it easy to make Pauly Shore the butt of a joke.
That's it. There are plenty more, but that is all I will cover. I never realized it before but making fun of Pauly Shore can become tedious over time.
Who knew?!!
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